Ageplay Discussion Site

Doing Self spankings

A spanking is just a spanking, except for when you don't have anyone to actually do the spanking. In this case what do you do? You know you need a spanking you know you need to do something to control your behavior. You know you need to find a method of doing this. But you do not have anyone there to do it. You do not know anyone to do it. Nor are you willing to take that risk to find someone to do it. Because there are many risks that come about from that endeavor.

In this case you decide to do the spanking yourself. To self spank means that you actually are the one who is administering the spanking to your own self.  How do you do this? How does one spank themselves?

I ask some questions to someone I know who has in the past administered spankings to herself. The questions and answers in red are listed below.

1. Do you think that self spankings work?

Yes, I can honestly say that in my case from both a stand point of before and after I had a “grownup” in my life to do the spanking, that they did work. I had wanted to change things in my life that I saw as “bad, wrong, not right, bothersome, etc.” and I attempted to find ways to correct those behaviors within myself long before I had an adult figure to help me with them.
I am not speaking about “play spankings” here I am talking about good honest to goodness changes that I wanted made in my life, and as such I needed to have consequences when I flubbed up things or made the same mistakes repeatedly or on purpose even just because I was being lazy.
You are your own worst critic, so you have to keep this in mind if you’re going to take on the role of self disciplinarian. It’s not as easy as it sounds to spank yourself. But it can be done and done the right way if you’re willing enough to do it.
When I had found my “grownup, adult figure” it became much easier to do the self spanking, because they were on the phone with me. There really wasn’t a way to say no to the authoritative voice on the other end of the line, because I was the one who had asked for that same person to come into my life in the first place because I needed someone like that in my life.

2. Do you actually feel that you are being punished when you have to spank yourself ?

 When I was doing this on my own, I didn’t know how hard to spank, so I can honestly say that I may have spanked a larger number but I didn’t spank any were as hard as I did once I was “taught” by my Daddy to over the phone. He was able to teach me using both the sound over the phone as well as a web cam to show the proper angles. He also did not spank as high a number as I tended to do, but he also did not need to!
When I have done something that needs correcting and has earned a spanking I am a person who focuses on that fact. I focus directly on the spanking while it’s happening and when it is over I think about what earned me the spanking in the first place. I do not like to disappoint people, especially my grownups so yes while I am being spanked for doing just that, I do feel like I am being punished. However at the point in my life that I was being self spanked I was without a grownup and then had a long distance relationship with my grownup. So the self spanking went hand in hand with scolding which had to come first because if you don’t know what your doing wrong, then how can you feel badly for having done it in the first place?
I am not talking about degrading type scolding, at least that never worked on me, but instead more the rational talking calmly and lovingly to me until I understood what it was that I had done wrong type of scolding. Because if you yell at me, I will only get angry and defensive with you I will not feel accepting of any punishment.

3. How is self spanking effective? Why or why not?

 As I stated above, self spanking works in a few ways the first being if you are a single person who doesn’t have a person to assist with your discipline needs. The second being if you’re in a relationship with a person that is far away and, you need to deal with a problem via the phone then self spanking is a good way to deal with problem areas as they come up.
Now on the flip side there is a problem with self spanking for both of those two things. A person who does self spanking due to long distance reasons could be tempted to use them as a way to gain attention from there “spanker”. They could also use them as a way to berate themselves if they are the one doing the spanking solely. Anything can be taken to extremes, as can self spanking. If you’re not careful you can be to critical of yourself and take out things that shouldn’t be on your bottom.

4. By your own experience how do you self spank?

Well I had come up with many ways to self spank. The easiest way was to bend over my bed leaning on my side using my arm in full swing to swat my bottom with an implement. The easiest things I found to spank myself with were larger paddles but not too large and long armed items such as wooden spoons and things. Hand spanking doesn’t work with self spanking unless your spanking your front part of your legs or your inner thighs. These areas work well for when you’re riding in a car and need to pull over to deal with a problem and can’t do the bending over pants down thing. They are also good for when you’ve been punished already on your bottom and have acted up again.

5. Have you ever faked a self spanking by saying you did it when in fact you did not? Why or why not?

Ok let me start off by saying, that I am not talking about play spanking fun here but real punishment, were an honest lesson is needed to be learned. So to start this answer no I did not ever fake a spanking by not doing one when in fact I said I had. Reason one; Well what would the point be in that? Remember that I was the one who wanted a grownup in my life to help me change things about myself in the first place. Reason two; that would be adding to my problems by adding fibbing to my list of crimes which to my Daddy is one MAJOR no-no. LOL He even considers not telling him EVERY part of something a fib by omission. I will say that the one punishment that I did kind of fake when I was doing it before I had a Daddy was I gave myself lines to write and I gave myself WAY to many of them for something and I never did finish them for a certain crime, cussing. LOL

6. Would you recommend self spankings to someone? Why or why not?

Yes I would recommend it, so long as the person has put a lot of thought into the reasons why they want to do it. And so long as they are prepared to do it fully and that they aren’t just using it as a way to “hurt themselves”. I would also recommend it to someone who lived in a relationship with someone whom wasn’t able to do disciplinary things in person on a very regular basis. Letting those types of things sit and fester tends to put up walls and build up tension between people even if they are unaware of it happening.

7. What advice would you give someone who wanted to start self spanking?

I would start off with this, first. Make a list of the things about yourself that you and only you think need work. I am not talking about things that you hear other people commenting on, but more the things deep inside your heart. This is the best place to make sure that the basic reasons for starting any kind of discipline routine is based not on play but actually based on need not just want.
I would then take your list and put them in order from what you would consider your worst “crimes” to the least offensive crimes. Once you have gotten your list down to the order sequence, and then begin a second list. On this list think of different types of punishments do not just think of spanking when doing this list. But think of anything that you HATE.
When you have a good sized list of things that you hate rearrange those into order from the most hated to the least hated as well. Now you can try to match up your offenses to your consequence list. This is the hardest part because you have to turn off your emotions especially the one that makes you a chicken. You have to be fair but mean at the same time.
If let’s say the top offense is that you didn’t do four hours of study time in a week, then you need to find something that would equal that in your hate list. You would need to think about the long term consequences of not studying and the short term as well. Which might be that you don’t do so well on the exam this week because you didn’t put enough effort into studying the material as you should have. The overall long term effect is that by not getting the A that you could have gotten instead you got a C so now your GPA is affected.
This is when you have to shut off your emotional response that would make you a chicken, because you would have earned a spanking. Why? Because your action had a reaction of possibly causing long term damage to yourself aka your college grades which will possibly affect your resume and job.
But on the flip side of this same coin, let’s just say that if you had only burnt the toast for your boyfriend this a.m. and you want to improve your kitchen skills. That on the grand scheme of things is not something that would earn you a spanking. Maybe some other punishment that’s on your list that is better suited to the kitchen such as scrubbing the floor in the kitchen by hand to remind you to pay better attention to meals while your cooking.